


Dear Theodosia

by JetGirl1832, tomatopudding



Series: The Other Family Album [5]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, F/M, Family, Gen, Illnesses, Mentions of Cancer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-08
Updated: 2019-03-08
Packaged: 2019-11-14 05:29:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18046391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JetGirl1832/pseuds/JetGirl1832, https://archiveofourown.org/users/tomatopudding/pseuds/tomatopudding
Summary: Theo wasn't supposed to find out this way, at least that was what her parents had hoped. Now they must all figure out how to cope.





	Dear Theodosia

Theo actually kind of liked being at these sorts of political events. Part of it was that she loved spending time with her parents. She’d always asked when she was younger to come even as they were leaving her with a babysitter and heading out the door. But when her father had heard that Angie’s father was allowing her to come to events, he had relented. So Theo was ten and she got to dress up nicely and even wear a little bit of tinted lip gloss and stay up way past her bedtime playing with her very best friend. At first the two had worried about having to separate when it was uncertain if Theo’s father would win the senate race. But thankfully he had so Theo needn’t worry about her friend moving away without her.

And of course, neither of them really paid attention to what the events were about. What did they care? Sometimes one of their fathers would have to make a speech and they would listen dutifully without really knowing what was being spoken about. At this particular event, that wasn’t the case so Theo and Angie didn’t need to take a break from their playing. 

“Don’t run, darling,” Aaron said when she and Angie’s game of tag got close. 

“Oh let her be,” said Theodosia Sr., “she’s just a child.”

“I’m not a child, I’m ten,” Theo responded, wrapping both of her hands around one of her mother’s and playing with her wedding ring to see the way the lights in the hotel ballroom made the diamond sparkle, “that’s double digits, which means I’m a tween. And that’s practically grown up.”

"Of course you are," Theodosia Sr. smiled.

Theo beamed as she looked towards Angie, who was talking to her older brother. Pip was really cool. The fact that he was two years older but still talked to them even at school was great. Of course, Angie was his sister but Theo knew plenty of siblings who couldn’t stand each other. Her thought briefly drifted to Angie and one of her younger brothers, Junior. Not that they hated each other or anything, they just didn’t always get along. Despite having sisters, Theo couldn't say that she knew what that was like. Not only were her sisters really half sisters, but Anna was fourteen years older than her and Lulu was thirteen years older than her. They’d always had their own rooms in the house, but they hadn’t been around too much. At least, not in Theo’s memory. While Theo spent all her time there, Anna and Lulu flitted back and forth between there and their father’s house. 

So Theo hadn’t had the typical sibling experience. The closest she had was her relationship with Angie. Theo was so lost in her own thoughts that she didn’t notice at first when her parents started their hushed argument. She'd been about the rejoin Angie when she'd heard her mother's tone become sharp and cold.

“Can we talk about this somewhere else?” she said, “People are looking.”

Theo has no idea what they were speaking about, but she had never heard her mother use that tone. 

“Oh, well if people are watching, we’d better make it entertaining for them!” Theo’s father huffed in reply. 

“Aaron, don’t,” Theodosia Sr warned.

"Why not?"

Theo didn't think that she'd ever seen her father so upset in her life, she began to worry. There was obviously something wrong and she wished someone would just say it already. Even though Angie was waving at her Theo didn't move, staying close to her parents in an attempt to know what was happening.

Because despite the comment about people watching, her parents were still speaking in fairly low voices and only to each other, seemingly unaware that Theo was listening. 

She watched as he mother closed her eyes and pressed her lips into a thin line as if she was in deep thought. 

"I just think that would be a mistake," she finally said.

“Teddy,” Aaron said, “I just want to make this whole thing easier for you.”

Theodosia heaved a sigh, “And I appreciate that, Aaron, but you can’t act like this is the end of the world and just drop everything.”

"Well someone needs to be there for you," Aaron insisted.

"That can be you, but that doesn't mean you need to quit the senate, honestly..." Theodosia sighed.

Quit the senate? Now Theo knew it was serious. Of course that knowledge didn’t prepare her for her father’s next words. 

“Teddy, you have cancer...”

Theo didn’t hear the rest of the sentence as her heart started pounding in her ears. 

“Cancer?” she said in a faint, small voice. 

Her parents noticed her then, turning to her almost in unison. 

“Oh, baby,” Theodosia murmured, placing her hands on Theo’s shoulders. 

“Are you going to die?” Theo found herself asking, her eyes feeling hot from the tears threatening to fall. 

“I’ll go get the car,” Aaron said, briefly brushing a hand over the top of Theo’s head. 

Theodosia said nothing as she pulled Theo close to her and held her tight. The rest of the evening was a bit of a blur: standing there in the hotel ballroom flowed into the car ride home flowed into a conversation around the kitchen table about leukemia and chemotherapy and side effects and everything will be okay you’ll see. When her father said it was late and took her to bed Theo shuffled along mutely. There was too much going on in her mind for Theo to think clearly and while she was tired it took quite some time before she fell into a restless sleep. 

About a week later, Anna and Lulu came to visit DC, which had been planned a while before. Normally Theo would have been thrilled to see her older sisters but her heart wasn’t in it. In fact her heart hadn’t been in much of anything lately, she’s been sort of floating through the days in a haze. She didn’t remember a single thing she had learned in school that week. Even when she’d gone to Angie’s after school she didn’t have the fun she usually did. Angie hadn’t commented on it so either her parents had told her not to or Theo was a better actor than she thought she was. But now her sisters were here, having just arrived from the airport. 

A while later, she wasn’t sure how long, there was a soft knock at the door, followed by a light creak as it swung open. Theo glanced up and saw that Lulu was approached while Anna loitered in the doorway with her arms crossed. 

“Hey,” Lulu said, sitting at the foot of the bed which was near the desk. Theo swiveled her desk chair until she was facing Lulu. 

“How are you doing?” Lulu took her hand giving it a gentle squeeze.

She wanted to say that she felt awful and that she was scared and that she wished none of this had happened. But the only thing she managed was a shrug. 

“Please don’t hold this in Tee,” Lulu spoke softy, “we’ve got to stick together.”

Theo felt vaguely like crying, but it was a far away sort of feeling like she was reading somebody else’s thoughts. 

“I know,” she said. 

“Anna and I are here for you, and you know you can call us at anytime,” Lulu added.

“I know,” Theo repeated. 

Lulu searched her face, for what Theo didn’t know, but whatever she saw it made her pull Theo forward into a hug. They didn’t hug like this very often, it felt strange but Theo tried to relax into it. Anna came to place a hand on each of their shoulders. She knew what they were saying was true, they had to look out for each other. Theo wanted to try, but she wasn’t sure she could. And it wasn’t like the cancer their mother had was a death sentence. It wasn’t curable, but it was treatable and all the doctors were optimistic and about as close to making promises as a doctor could get, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t scared. She asked her mother a lot of questions, wanting real answers. The answers were often too vague, everything was dependent on everything else; we won’t know until after this or we’ll find out when we do that. It wasn’t enough. Theo allowed her eyes to close, resting her cheek on Lulu’s chest and listening to her heart beat.

**Author's Note:**

> My mother was diagnosed with leukemia when I was around Theo's age in this fic. The way that she reacts and the things she think about feeling or not feeling mirror very closely my own reactions at that time. My mom is fine now, she's been in remission for about ten years or so, but I will always remember how it felt back then to find out. I had nightmares that night and will never again be able to watch the movie that my family and I watched right before my parents told me and my brother about the diagnosis.   
> ~tomatopudding


End file.
